Scanxiety and the Result

Today was a long day. It started at 5am with a trip to Medical City for Eva's scans.

Today's scans were her one-year post-chemo scans. Your chance of recurrence is greatest within the first two years, however, the first year scan is a biggie. In the 20 months we've had this, we have never had clean scans.

Back when we found the gigantic tumor, we had it removed in March 2008. However, it had pressed right on her spine so there was some residual tumor left. In June 2008, we found out that the residual tumor piece decided to grow so we had to start chemo. Post chemo, all the remaining tumor had gone away except for one small piece close to her lower belly. It was in a weird location so after meeting with our oncologist and our surgeon, we decided to leave it there and watch it. All the scans throughout this year have been clear except for that little piece of tumor, which was not growing.

Leading up to the past two weeks, I've been a bit preoccupied with thoughts of the scan. Eva says her tummy hurts, is it cancer? Is it the flu? Is she just being a dramatic 3-year old? Who knows?? Everything seemed to take me to cancer. Eva has black circles under her eyes, a sore tummy, she's not eating, her body aches, she's running a small fever, her breathing is labored. What are these all symptoms of? Cancer. Oh, and a really bad cold.

Prior to February 2008, I was probably the most apathetic Mom when it came to these things. I'm like the news, if it bleeds, it leads. Beyond that, I was pretty calm. But, once cancer enters your house, your ability think rationally changes completely.

So, here we were to today at the hospital.

Pretty normal stuff. Eva came out with flying colors thanks to the World's Greatest Anesthesiologist, Dr. Davis.

One thing that sort of bothered me a bit, however, is that he had her back for over an hour. Usually, she's only in for about 40 minutes. Not to panic, just sort of wondering.

8am-Called the doctor's office, just to leave my mobile number for the results.

10am-Got back to the office. The timer had started. Usually, I hear back from them around lunch time. Ok, I can wait two hours. I pick up my cellphone and literally carry it with me everywhere in the office. Tick tock tick tock.

Lunch-What did I have for lunch? I don't have a clue. My stomach was in knots and I just had one thing on my mind. I start talking to my phone "Ring!!! Ring!!!"

1pm-I've now called two times. "This is Kristi, again, just checking in on Eva's results..."

2pm-Starting to panic. Strange that they have not called yet. I've now called three times "Hi there, don't mean to bother you but, this is Kristi, just checking on Eva's results..."

2:30pm-I'm starting to freak out. What is the delay? Why have they not called???

3pm- Welcome to Crazy Town, Population 1. What is the deal? Why no call??? Are they waiting to hear back from Sloan Kettering because they had to call in someone?? Has the cancer spread so much that they are trying to just figure out how to tell me???? Are they off for an afternoon of golf?? I DON'T KNOW!!!! Ring, damnit, ring!!!! I can't sit down, I can't think about anything.

3:20pm-Phone rings. It's the nurse. She says that the scans are not yet read. She told me that they have been checking on them all day but were still waiting on the results. I'm completely calm, "Oh, no problem, just sitting here waiting for the results. I'll just wait a bit longer."

4:30pm-Sitting in Jack's Parent Teacher conference with Jack's teacher and the head of the school (yep, it's been one of those years with Jack). Phone rings.

The Result:
For the first time since February 2008, Eva has No Evidence of Disease (NED).

The tumor that was there in her belly was completely gone. No sign of any tumors anywhere.

What does that mean for us?

We meet with the doctor at the end of the month. As far as I know now, we'll still closely scan her for the next year, as per the regimen. After two years, we get to scan every six months. Then, we'll go on from there.

As for us, we celebrated HARD last night. Bought a cake that Jack picked out, had champagne for us and "champagne" for the kids. We toasted and cheered and laughed and had a great time.

Let the wild rumpus begin.